the 5 year plan

today is my 5 year wedding anniversary. my husband got home early from work and we exchanged gifts. i got an xm radio boombox. i can move it from room to room or outside (you can put batteries in it). very cool. i got my husband some cologne, candy, and a book about sexual positions--hubba hubba. we are going to go out for dinner later. we were going to relive our first date--meet at the coffee shop, go out to the middle eastern restaurant, and then go walk on campus in the flower gardens where there is a small frog pond. the recent cold front might put that plan to the back burner.

my husband is the nicest, most considerate person i know. he has always been very good w/ my two kids who were 8 and 3 when we started dating even though he didn't have much background with kids. we are very different people. i am very moody, spazzy, and get worked up easy. he, on the other hand, is even tempered, relaxed, and happy to just sit around. we are each other's yin and yang. sometimes this drives the both of us crazy but most of the time it is for the best. when i get worked up he is able to come me down.

that said i still think marriage is hard. marriage takes work. when you put it on auto-pilot it starts to nosedive. of course i am high maintainence so maybe this is just my marriage. i don't know why people write and read all those self-help books and watch dr. phil. i don't know if there is a secret to staying married. (hey i've beem divorced once so why listen to me....) sometimes it does suck and you both feel like running far away from each other but usually that feeling passes.

that said...has anyone read about the new thing? now in addition to pre-nups there are post-nups. say you or your husband are about to come into a lot of $$$, land, etc. you write up a post-nup detailing how much of whatever each of you should be entitled to. sounds rational and i guess 3 years down the road you don't want to spend days or weeks or months and lawyer's fees arguing over whatever it is but it seems to say to me, "i don't really trust you or have much faith in you as a person." if that is how you feel why are you married??? in the back of your mind you are thinking--if push comes to shove this person is willing and would fuck me over. what happened to romance i ask ya?